At peace with the world…

I sat back earlier today and thought I am finally at peace with the world (well except spammers, but there is a general consensus that they are not human! 😉 )

Seriously though I sat back today and thought about my life, what I have and where I am and realised I am blessed. I don’t know whether I have made it myself, or whether I’m lucky, or whether it’s a bit of both, but I have no financial worries, I have a lovely place to live. I have investments for the future, no debts (at all) and I have a beautiful girl called Katie whom I love dearly.

Yesterday I decided whilst waiting for my stuff to arrive I’d invest in some storage containers for the fresh coffee, and promptly bought a new cast iron Wok, as well as the containers and a set of digital scales, the total surprised me, but then I saw the culprit.. the wok was an “exclusive set” .. what a load of b*****ks, it’s a wok with a set of chopsticks! Seriously, its a proper cast iron one, so it’s well worth the 140.00 euros I paid for it (around Au$250) as it will keep the heat of the gas than therefore I should get better stirfrys. When it came to paying though, I handed over my handy card, and for once didn’t worry about what the limit was, whether there was fund available, how I was going to afford the rent etc.. I just paid and thanked the lady and walked out.

Wandering back to the car I noticed a lovely dress in another local shop, and so I went back to investigate (after putting the purchases in the car) The dress didn’t fit (just too tight on the shoulders, it was beautiful though!) at the same time I noticed a new Cashmere jumper which fits perfectly, and another very raunchy dress. Unfortunately they didn’t have the size I was looking for (a 42 = 12) but without shoulders I was able to get into it even though it was a 40 (Size 10)… The shop was stunned, I bought it… Again, because I can without worries… It feels so good, a life without worries… what more can I ask for?

My little excursion was done without much thought or preperation because I was going out last night to our company Xmas party, and so rather than get ready in the morning, go out, come home, get changed, get ready etc.. I figured I wouldn’t worry about makeup, and I’d go as I am. The really interesting thought there is that there are others I know (TS/TV and CD) who will not go out without makeup. I even know some genetic girls that won’t, but looking around the world and looking at the amount of girls that use make up day to day… it’s a very small selection.. for this reason I occasionally go out without makeup, and I have been more confident in that over the recent weeks… Yesterday was the culmination of all of that, I went shopping with no makeup (at all). I didn’t have a skirt on, I didn’t worry about anything, and I was totally accepted as me for me, and I think this is the reason I am finally at peace with the world. What more can I ask for, the raw me is seen, there is no hiding, no changing needed, I’m talking face to face with shop staff and they don’t even notice I am TS (or they just don’t care.) These shops are places I have never been into, and I don’t get funny looks other customers are happy to use the changing rooms and in one case ask my opinion about a top.. standing there in just her knickers and the top.

I never thought this day would come, I am so glad it has.

The other thing that has contributed has to be that, Katie and I have finally announced our love for each other. Until now we had been keeping it private (not secret, but not announcing it to the world) yesterday she told her family, and made it public on our Facebook pages (sorry people not adding anyone new there unless you’re family or in the photos I take.) She’s leaving Australia moving in with me in Malta in the new Year, such a big step, but she need not worry as I taking every precaution to make sure the trip runs smoothly. My only worry is the “homesickness” that one can get when moving away for the first time. Malta is of course on the other side of the world. I will be setting up yet another VOIP number for her so she can talk to her family and friend as if she was living in Brisbane, but it will still be hard.

All of this coupled with my passport changes and my trip to London are why I am so happy. My very good friend Harriett said, “Shells, you are visibly different from last week. You look happy and relaxed.” Thank you Harriett!